Saturday, February 04, 2006

Six Degrees of Procrastination: Childfree

Eh, well, not exactly. I meant to play Six Degrees of Procrastination with Wikipedia's entry on the Childfree movement, but the movement itself is just so hilarious that I never got away from the page. Instead, here are the six best terms in Wikipedia's list of movement slang. (I think you'll see why I was in difficulty.)

Fence-sitter: A person who has not yet decided whether or not to have children
Fleshloaf: See "loaf"
Free range child: An unsupervised child, usually one who is not staying put or who is wreaking havoc in public
Hipmoo: Trendy mother, usually lax as a disciplinarian, who subscribes to any popular earthy-crunchy parenting trend, such as the family bed, uncovered breastfeeding in public, allowing children to self-wean, and so on
Loaf: Freshly hatched offspring; newborn
S-MOO-V: A massive sport-utility vehicle filled with baby paraphernalia, old drive-through food, or abandoned toys, driven erratically by a parent focusing more attention on the children in the back than the road all around him/her
Sprog: A child. Also "yard ape," "crotch dumpling," "crotch dropping," "sproglet," "spawn," "anklebiter," "shriekling," "fleshloaf", "squatmonkey", "kitchen crawler", "rugrat", "railbiter"

"Railbiter"?

(I know that's seven terms, not six, but, Come on!)



Comments:
you left out "broodling" and "fucktrophy"
 
Those names seem appropriate to me.
 
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